Graceland, Too.
I should have known what I was getting into when the gas station attendant, whom I had asked for directions to Paul McLeod's house, replied: "Are you sure you wanna go there? That guy's a f*** lunatic!" Ummm… right. Feeling boldly adventurous, I then clearly missed paying attention to warning sign number two: Paul McLeod's house was not only the brightest on the block, it was actually painted a shocking Barbie-'dream house' pink! (with a tendency towards 80s neon billboard signs). Thing was, I couldn't turn back; as I had just travelled 2 hours southeast of Memphis after visiting the King's (i.e. for the non-initiated, Elvis') monkey-statued, flurry-furry-bedded glam-o-rama sideshow called 'Graceland'. What better to visit then than former Elvis impersonator Paul McLeod's house, the infamous 'Graceland, Too' (pun intended) after buying way too many key-chains and other jiggly stuff at one of the various souvenir shops at Graceland? "Finally, a bit of authenticity", I thought, not knowing that truth is sometimes better left alone.
So I finally got to meet the (in his words) 'greatest Elvis fan in the galaxy ', in his house which doubles as a museum, and is open 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, boasting the biggest and (in his words) most valuable Elvis collection in the world. Basically, the 'museum' is an old musty Southern States villa stuffed with Elvis memorabilia of all kinds: chewing gum wrappers line the ceiling, old 45s are lined up on shrines bordered with old x-mas tinsels, a bunch of creepy looking mannequins sport sparkly Elvis suits, and huge black chests are piled up everywhere, containing hundreds of thousands of video tapes of recorded Elvis TV shows. He said. I hoped. Because Paul's slightly crazed look and mentioning of his vast 'gun collection' were slowly making me imagine that the content in those boxes were not really videocassettes, but… well… museum visitors who didn't quite make the whole tour.
I then learned that Chris O'Donnell is a regular visitor – there are pics of drunken Chris to prove it! – and that Disney and those other great big corporations have tried to buy him out, but Paul has been steadfast in defending his collection valued at 10 million dollars by Lloyd's of London. Now, does that include those two neon-pink lions flanking the steps to the museum entrance, I wondered, their eyes painted green, because, as Paul told me: "The King's eyes on the first misprinting of his 3rd record of 1959 [or so] are green!!". Or, does that include those photographs showing a flash of lightning, which, as Paul stated, depict "the ghost of the King!" As if I hadn't been creeped out enough, Paul then showed me a newspaper clipping of a baby licking the King's blood after a car accident, apparently his son (or so I recall hearing). The son, whom I still feel really sorry for, not just because of the blood-licking incident, is named Elvis Aaron Presley McLeod, "has a photographic memory, and looks just like the King!" Paul declared. "Yeah, he does!" I lied, on one hand strangely fascinated by Paul and his Victorian clutter version of Graceland, on the other just wanting to get out, pronto. But Paul had a final question: 'You married? Or got any unmarried sisters? Cause my son is looking for a wife.' Of course he is, poor Elvis Aaron!
Graceland, Too has perhaps done the most irrevocable damage to my formerly rather candid notion of elderly Elvis fans, not to mention being the cause of much bewilderment (mainly at being asked to marry the son of an Elvis impersonator). But after about three months of being stunned, I did finally realize that what Paul offered was not a madman's copy of Graceland, but a real, honest (and mad) account of a fan and his favourite stuff. So… anybody ready for Graceland Three?
So I finally got to meet the (in his words) 'greatest Elvis fan in the galaxy ', in his house which doubles as a museum, and is open 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, boasting the biggest and (in his words) most valuable Elvis collection in the world. Basically, the 'museum' is an old musty Southern States villa stuffed with Elvis memorabilia of all kinds: chewing gum wrappers line the ceiling, old 45s are lined up on shrines bordered with old x-mas tinsels, a bunch of creepy looking mannequins sport sparkly Elvis suits, and huge black chests are piled up everywhere, containing hundreds of thousands of video tapes of recorded Elvis TV shows. He said. I hoped. Because Paul's slightly crazed look and mentioning of his vast 'gun collection' were slowly making me imagine that the content in those boxes were not really videocassettes, but… well… museum visitors who didn't quite make the whole tour.
I then learned that Chris O'Donnell is a regular visitor – there are pics of drunken Chris to prove it! – and that Disney and those other great big corporations have tried to buy him out, but Paul has been steadfast in defending his collection valued at 10 million dollars by Lloyd's of London. Now, does that include those two neon-pink lions flanking the steps to the museum entrance, I wondered, their eyes painted green, because, as Paul told me: "The King's eyes on the first misprinting of his 3rd record of 1959 [or so] are green!!". Or, does that include those photographs showing a flash of lightning, which, as Paul stated, depict "the ghost of the King!" As if I hadn't been creeped out enough, Paul then showed me a newspaper clipping of a baby licking the King's blood after a car accident, apparently his son (or so I recall hearing). The son, whom I still feel really sorry for, not just because of the blood-licking incident, is named Elvis Aaron Presley McLeod, "has a photographic memory, and looks just like the King!" Paul declared. "Yeah, he does!" I lied, on one hand strangely fascinated by Paul and his Victorian clutter version of Graceland, on the other just wanting to get out, pronto. But Paul had a final question: 'You married? Or got any unmarried sisters? Cause my son is looking for a wife.' Of course he is, poor Elvis Aaron!
Graceland, Too has perhaps done the most irrevocable damage to my formerly rather candid notion of elderly Elvis fans, not to mention being the cause of much bewilderment (mainly at being asked to marry the son of an Elvis impersonator). But after about three months of being stunned, I did finally realize that what Paul offered was not a madman's copy of Graceland, but a real, honest (and mad) account of a fan and his favourite stuff. So… anybody ready for Graceland Three?
posted by copy team at 10:24 PM
1 Comments:
how excellent!
if i were you i'd seriously consider this marrage proposal - elvis aaron will be heir to the 10 million dollar collection, and perhaps after merging with industrial light and magic or universal, will franchise the graceland too brand for a neat sum. you could be richer than lisa mary presley! not to mention, the pink house you would get to live in. and all the elvis-blood you can eat. ew.
n.
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